Why I quit my job almost instantly after my sabbatical (part 1/2), and what I will do after (part 3/4)

Having time to think changes you. I do not recommend it for everyone. For those who are thinking about taking a sabbatical, let me tell you what could happen to you if you do.  

In part one of my 'after sabbatical report', I explained what I learned and how it changed me. I became relaxed, focused, moisturized, 'in my zone'. Weirdly enough, I have not felt like that since, well, probably high school. This realization was both profound and terrifying.

It ‘only’ took me about four months to go through the terrifying phase and enter the relaxed phase. The transition gave me a clarity that was missing in my life for a long time. But, all good things come to an end, and in November 2021 I went ‘back on the job’.

By lunchtime however, I knew that I had to quit. It felt wrong.

Why, you might wonder. Why would someone leave a well-paid job with colleagues that he considered some of his best friends with a baby underway? And what would you do instead?

Well, here is why. What I did instead comes after.

(1) Clarity is a b***h

The clarity I enjoyed at the end of my sabbatical is hard to explain. Especially when you are forced back into working life, affectionately called the rat race by some. Being in a rat race was absolutely how I felt when I started working again.

To me, it was as if everyone was crawling around trying to look as busy and excited as possible, fully occupied with themselves. This in and of itself is fine, of course. Everyone is free to be as busy as they please, that is up to them. This time it felt different to me however. I felt like an anthropologist who stumbled upon a new hyper-pre-occupied society that is in a constant feedback loop with itself. About the wrong things.

“Work to work. Do not question why. Here is some fuck-you money which we call salary, now be a good drone.”

The rat race is real, and it is hard to unsee once seen. Having clarity alone is not enough however. You need to act upon it. And at that moment, the first day back on the job sitting at my desk feeling sorry for myself, I heard that voice in my head saying “this is wrong”.

The voice begged me to get up and run for the door as fast as I could. Of course, "I" did not listen. What I did initially was nothing at all.

I ‘reasoned’ that this voice telling me it was wrong, was simply me getting used to the rhythm of the rat race. The beating of the drums of bureaucracy. The machinations of politics which we tell ourselves ‘exist in every organization’. O the lies we tell ourselves sometimes...

(2) When life gives you lemonade

How to seize an opportunity

In hindsight I know I should have abandoned the race a long time ago. A part of me always knew that the opportunities ‘out there’ are abound. That same voice that told me to “get out while you still can”, also told me something else. It said that I just had to be more of me. It said to “just do it". And luckily, that voice was absolutely right.

After two weeks on the job, I found myself standing on a barge next to the Skoonbox together with Peter Paul, one of the founders of Skoon. What happened was weird. I felt something I did not feel in a long time. Exhilaration. While standing there with cold, wet feet in dank water from the river IJ next to the central station in Amsterdam, I just knew it.

This is the place where the future is made.

What happened next is the stuff of dreams. While I was still reeling with passion, Peter Paul simply asked: "Hey, when will you start working at Skoon?". Although I had to overcome the initial surprise, that inner voice started screaming again. This time with utter joy.

It begged me to say "yes" right there on the spot, but I managed to compose myself a little. I remember my reply was something to the effect of: "Uhm, ok. How about I'll pay you a visit next week?". And so it happened.

I am excited to say that I am now officially a part of the Skoon team.

(3) Building a marketplace for clean energy

Skoon

Skoon is building a place where you can get clean energy on demand. Instead of a generator running on diesel on a yard, you can simply rent a containerized battery. Or a hybrid-electric generator with solar panels. Is your problem that you need temporary energy on demand? We provide you with a clean solution. This place will lay the foundation of the flexible (and smart) grid that will form the basis of infrastructure of the 21st century. Exciting stuff, but what will be my part in this?

My role will be 'Marine Lead', and as such I will focus on one thing and one thing only: help people with 'wet' problems. What are wet problems?

Think battery-assisted shore power, replacing generators offshore, on-site or at yards, work together to accomplish swapping stations for batteries to realize electric sailing and more. In shore, at Skoon I can help build the marine infrastructure of the future.

Most work is currently approached with batteries in the centre, but this will change as Skoon aims to be 'technology agnostic'. That means we do not want to sell a product - batteries - but help people with a service - provide clean energy on demand. We want to be able to provide a fitting solution for everyone.

I am truly thankful to be a part of Skoon, and thankful to Peter Paul and Daan in particular. What they have done so far, and the team they have brought together is remarkable. For the first time in a long time, I feel part of something bigger than myself again. I am fully dedicated to making Skoon the place for clean energy of the future.

It is not the only thing I plan to do however.

(4) Building a place for sustainability on demand

Sustainable Ships

Skoon is a place for clean energy on demand. For some shipowners however, that is not what they need. Some shipowners need help with other things. Like alternative fuels for example. Or how to get shore power in the first place. Or just general help with sustainability in general, for example to create a roadmap to decarbonize their vessel or entire fleet. And there are a lot of shipowners for which sustainability is not top of mind. On the contrary.

Most shipowners want to focus on their work. They are a busy lot, and most of them do not have a sustainability advisor of their own. For these shipowners, it is very hard to start. I want to help them on their sustainable journey. In other words;

I believe there is need for a place that provides "sustainability on demand". A place where shipowners pay for advice, not the advisor. A place where everyone - including you - can share knowledge, experience, and make money in the process. What does ‘including you’ mean?

I do not intend to make a place where I sell my services. It should be a place that enables everyone who likes to help others in the industry to provide sustainability on demand. A place where you can download customized feasibility studies for shore power, or guides on which alternative fuels suit your vessel most, which the author gets paid for. My vision would be to create ‘the Spotify of marine sustainability’.

It is still a work in progress, but as I believe in curiosity, courage, and collaboration, I thought I would live up to my values and share what I have build so far. You can visit it here. I am looking for people who want to join me making this place a reality. Just reach out to me if you want to build this together.

How about you?

Want to feel passion for your work again?

My main focus at the moment is to make Skoon into a place to get clean energy on demand. Sustainable Ships will be a place for sustainability on demand, that helps shipowners start their sustainable journey. Both these ventures could use your help in various ways.

Simply reach out to me via LinkedIn or contact Skoon directly. Why would you join, you might ask yourself? I’ll be honest.

It has been a while since I was genuinely flabbergasted by all the amazing 'stuff' that is happening in the world of maritime sustainability, especially electrification. I am truly astonished about the plans - and actual projects! - that are ongoing. Coming from me, this says a lot because I have always been bullish on maritime electrification and even I did not foresee the scale at which things are moving.

On top of that, it has been a while since I truly felt passion about 'work'. Instead of stress, I feel exhilaration when going to work. You know, that feeling you might had as a kid when came back to high school after summer holidays, wondering “what kind of things are in store for me this year?”.

Just a few days ago, as I was walking towards the Skoon office together with Peter Paul and we discussed all the wonderful opportunities out there, we both felt it.

"What a time to be alive", was the feeling. This was the first time in years that I actually felt like that again when on the job.

Reach out and perhaps we can help you feel the same.